Thursday, October 7, 2010

Recently... (This is a rant! Viewer discresion may be advised)

Recently, while talking to people under the age of twenty I have been told;

  1. Being around drugs and alchohol isn't all that bad
  2. When me and my boyfriend have sex...
  3. I coudn't make it to church, I had to work (Or even better) My mom didn't wake me up.

  4. @#$@#%# (Potty mouth anyone??)

And there are pleanty more where this came from.

Have you ever felt like just SHAKING people and screaming "DON"T YOU GET IT!?"

For those of us that understand, it all comes so simply! Drugs and alchohol are bad because they impare your judgment and even stupider things come of it.

Sex is for marriage, nuff said.

Church is more important than sleep because well, GOD is more important than sleep.

Recently it has come to light that fewer people than I ever thought don't understand this like I do.

Have you ever run into people like this? Of course you have...

How do you deal?

Especially since last night a #2 came from a girl who recently turned 14! And hadn't been a virgin for a YEAR AND A HALF!!!!

This is purely REDICULOUS! What are we teaching our kids anyomore? anything? Doesn't seem so from where I'm sitting.

So I'm coming to you dear readers... for advise.

How do you tell these people this is wrong? Especially without turning new believers away forever. Without making people think you're holding up a sign saying "No Sinners Allowed."

I'm running out of words... and courage. I'd love to hear scripture, stories of what YOU have been through, and pleanty of encouragement.

I can now read your comments from home, So please, PLEASE do!

Keep your prayers and your Emails and comments coming!

Love and Huggs



Lady Weaver said...

These are all really hard to deal with. The best advice I can give is learn why you do what you do. (Ha! I'm preaching to the choir here!)

It's so easy - especially when we've been brought up in church - to become "Doers". Most of us have forgotten that the Bible first says "Be ye doers, no hearers only." In other words, they understood the scripture and then did.

It becomes hypocrisy when you begin to DO without BEING first. The best thing you can do for these people is to show them love - godly love. Don't condone what they're doing, but love them anyway. You know... I think I'll make a blog post on this topic. There's too much to just put in one comment.

I love you girl! Stay strong in Christ.

beast'sbelle said...

Hi Meggie,
Sorry you're struggling with this. I know it can be tough when people around you just don't seem to be getting it! :{
The number one thing I'd say is Pray, Pray, Pray! That's where it has to begin.
First, pray for your friends who are struggling. Pray that God would convict them of sin in their life, that He would use circumstances in their lives to give them a desire to follow Him with all their hearts.
Next, pray for God's grace for yourself as you prepare to talk to them and spend time with them. Ask God for the wisdom to know how to best show them His love while interacting with them. There have been so many times when I've had to have a difficult conversation with someone (usually my husband...and no, don't worry, it's never about any of these topics). :) Praying about it beforehand is always so comforting because I remember that it's not up to me to change someone else's mind or heart. I can be a tool used by God to encourage or convict them, but it's the Holy Spirit that does the work. This takes some of the pressure off and helps me just relax about it. Then I'm more able to be open to the Spirit's leading. And on that note, use caution when trying to have "the conversation" with them. If you're trying to steer every talk you have with them towards a serious discussion of how they're messing up their lives, it may push them away. Each situation will be different. Sometimes, you may need to hit a topic head on, while other times it may be better to ask the Lord to open the conversation for you.
I completely agree with Lady Weaver's comment. The best way to deal with those around you in these sorts of situations is to show them the love of Christ. As much as you'd like to get a really big Bible and beat them over the head with it, it's not going to do much good. :) Remember that we all make mistakes, and but for the grace of God, we could all be in the same mindset.
Keep in the Word and prayer. You'll be in my prayers, too. I know how tough this can be.
I was thinking of Ephesians 4:14-16:
"As a result, we are no longer to be children, tossed here and there by waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, by craftiness in deceitful scheming; but SPEAKING THE TRUTH IN LOVE [emphasis mine], we are to grow up in all aspects into Him who is the head, even Christ, from whom the whole body, being fitted and held together by what evey joint supplies, according to the proper working of each individual part, causes the growth of the body for the building up of itself in love."
It sounds like some of your friends are buying into the trickery and deceitfulness of the world's messages to them. Focus on your own walk and growth in Christ, and then, by showing Christ's love and lovingly speaking the truth, you can be a blessing to others and help them in their growth.
Hope this is an encouragement to you...sorry it was such a long comment! Being long-winded has always been one of my shortcomings. :}

beast'sbelle said...

Hi Meggie,
I'm so sorry you're having to deal with this. I know it can be really difficult.
Well, I had a nice, long, profound comment that I worked on until I had everything worded just right, and Blogger said it was too long and erased it! :{
Here's the basic thought I had though. Pray, Pray, Pray! Pray for your friends, that they would be convicted of sin and drawn closer to the Lord. Pray for yourself as you prepare to interact with them. Pray that the Holy Spirit would give you His grace to know the best way to show them His love. In the past, when I've had a difficult conversation coming, prayer has helped so much. It's a reminder that I'm not the one who has to change or fix others. I can be a willing tool, but it's the Holy Spirit that does the work. It's such a relief to know it's not all up to me. :) Then I can just relax and follow the Spirit's leading.
Along that same note, use caution when attempting to have "the conversation". If you try to hard to direct every talk towards the way they're messing up their lives, it may push them away. Sometimes, a direct conversation is needed, but often times it's best to just ask the Lord to open the conversation for you.
I completely agree with Lady Weaver on this one, too. Show your friends Christ's love. As much as we'd like to beat people over the head with our Bibles sometimes, it usually doesn't accomplish anything. :)
Above all, keep in the Word and in prayer. You'll be in my prayers too. I know how difficult this can be.
I'll leave you with a verse to look up: Ephesians 4:14-16 (I typed it all out before, but I think that's one of the reasons my comment was too long). :} It sounds like your friends have bought into the world's deceitfulness and lies. Focus on your walk with Christ, speak His truth in love, and you'll be a blessing to others, helping them grow in their walks, too.
I'll be praying for you, little sis! :)

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Natasha Atkerson said...

Your gonna have to rely on God to tell you when the appropriate time is. If you blurt out "OH! I can't believe you did that!" or "Hi! My names Natasha, you shouldn't sin like that!" You need to already have a realtionship of trust with people, if you barely know them it will come off as being jugemental and rude. SPEAK THE TRUTH IN LOVE~ Thats the best advice I can give you.

Avonlea_dreamer said...

Thanks guys! I'm deffinately praying and I'll keep your verses in mind! Belle, I got both comments! And it posted the second 4 times! Lol! Dont you just love computers! (I only removed the repeats) Keep the comments coming! I love hearing from you!

beast'sbelle said...

Sorry about that, Meggie! It didn't tell me it was posting just said " too long" or something like that. Now I really feel like I was long-winded! :}

Avonlea_dreamer said...

Natasha, thats the sad part I count these Girls as good Friends. And thought they were all good and "pure" (course they said they were, or I thought they did) Belle, dont worry about it! Lol! I understood what happened. :D

Stephanie Ann said...

This sounds really bad--I almost don't care that they aren't going to church but what on Earth are 14 year olds doing sleeping with each other?

It's really not healthy emotionally. I highly doubt they will marry who they are sleeping with at 14. How many more people will they sleep with before they find "the one?"

I am rather old in these times to still be a virgin but I always tell people that as much as I have liked my boyfrinds, I know I will love my husband so much more than I can even imagine yet.

When all is said and done it doesn't seem likely that I will regret not sleeping around--but seems very likely these young girls will regret a few things.

It will be really hard to convince your friends. You really don't want to preach to them, but leading by example--remember, in these times-- we are considered the weird ones. You have to give them reasons and the faith to step away from the herd.

Anonymous said...

Hi Meggie, wonderful post as always, I know what you mean about "I thought I knew them" kind of thoughts.. I've been\still am right there in my life...
I can't wax eloquent tonight, though, but I'll be praying for you even more than I have been doing..

Avonlea_dreamer said...

Stephanie, I agree entirely! I'm 19 and never even been kissed. I don't regret it in the least! To be able to tell my husband he's the only one. Kate, thank you. That means a lot. If you ever need to talk just shoot me an email!

Mrs. G said...

I really appreciate that Meggie! I'l keep you in my prayers!

Mrs. G said...

Meggie, I can concur, sometimes I feel like we're so alone about these things. I *so* want Godly spouses for my children and I pray about it often, but if the parents don't put a hedge around their children, then what? God's standard is God's standard regardless of who gets offended. The holiness of His bride is too important to trifle with. Blessings to you for your writings and sharing your heart.
Mrs. G

Emily said...

I saw Mrs. G linked to you and I find her fascinating and thought I'd click on over. I'm impressed to find young people like you who are trying to choose the right. Hang in there! It's all worth it!